Volume 2, Issue 14 June 22 - July 5, 2000

Dear Stephanie,

I like to videotape myself masturbating. I'm a shy person but watching myself on camera excites me. I have a new boyfriend who is a photographer and I'm afraid telling him will make him want to photograph me in the act. He is always suggesting I do some sexy shots for him. I'm not sure I want to do that; this fantasy is a private matter for me. Should I tell him?

: Camerashy

Dear Camerashy,

Don't tell the boyfriend. I seriously doubt that he shares all of his masturbatory habits with you. Besides, since most relationships end and most of them end badly, you don't want him having these goods on you. And please be careful with the tapes, I can only imagine what an established photographer can do if he gets his sticky little hands on some evidence like that. The only other thing I would like to caution you about is most photographers have one hell of a time keeping their dicks in their pants, especially if they photograph women. So, if a faithful boyfriend is something you value, then I suggest you find yourself a nice computer nerd.

Dear Stephanie,

I went to one of those dungeon places last week to be dominated. Instead of having an erotic and fun session, I was brutalized. When I told my Mistress she was too hard on me she called me a pansy. Is that what dominance is all about?

: Confused

Dear Confused,

Chances are you ARE a pansy, but she did not conduct herself properly as a Mistress. There is so much more to it than just punishment and often you will find an inexperienced Mistress who thinks beating someone up is domination. It's always advisable to discuss before the session what you'd like to experiment with. Some like body worship, others prefer role play such as teacher and student, where others swear by only bondage. I suggest you try another Mistress and a lot of communication first.

Dear Stephanie,

Can you recommend a place where I can find a straight jacket? No one ever ties me up properly. Maybe I'm Houdini like, but I need bondage that I can't slip out of. Any ideas?.

: Tom

Dear Tom,

I looked for one myself, and absolutely no luck! They are hard to get your hands on, unless you're crazy, then they are hard to get your hands out of. Which by the way, sounds exactly like what you need! All I can recommend for you is to have someone hog-tie you. Not someone inexperienced, I'm talking about a real cowboy! I guarantee you won't be able to get away. I love to

hog-tie my super, naughty slaves and then turn off all the lights and leave them in the dark for a good hour. Sucks the willfulness right out of them.

Dear Stephanie,

When I was young my older brother and sister made me wear girls underwear and suck my brother off. My sister would watch and laugh. This has given me the need to have these experiences, even now. My brother rarely ever lets me suck him now and I find myself looking elsewhere for these experiences. The problem is, it doesn't work unless I have a woman there to force me to wear female lingerie and laugh at me as I suck him off.

Most gay men aren't into this, so I'm having a difficult time fulfilling this need. I'm married to a wonderful woman who knows nothing of this and lately when I make love to her, I lose my erection and she ends up disappointed. I fell like my sex life is a mess.

: Mark

Dear Mark,

I think that more than your sex life is a mess. You need to go to a therapist, because incest is something I really don't abide in. Forced feminization, group sex, and humilation are all great things and I'd love to advise you on the ways of those worlds, but you are involved in mental patterns that need to be released. Your brother needs help too and I sure hope he doesn't have any children. I could only imagine what he does to them.

As far as your wife goes, I really think you should come clean with her about your rape as a child, and yes, it was rape. She should go to therapy with you and hopefully the two of you can grow together through this. When you get your head on straight, write again and I will be happy to talk about some exciting fantasy roleplay with you. Maybe your wife will even participate in this as well. 8