Volume 2, Issue 16 June 6 - July 19,2000

Think size doesn't matter? Are your mom and aunt the only women who say you're good looking and women must be nuts to avoid you? Stephanie Glenn will set you straight in Siren Chat. Stephanie also has her own website at www.sirenonline.com. E-mail her at sirenchat@aol.com, and ask her anything you want!

Hi Stephanie,

I was wondering if you could help with a problem I'm having with my partner in the intercourse department. We want different things he likes it when I'm on top, and for me, intercourse in and of itself is not all that satisfying. I absolutely do not have an orgasm without my clit being stimulated, and though we have tried to do this while I'm on top, I prefer him to take care of me while I'm lying comfortably on my back after he has an orgasm while he's inside me. I also worry during the act about giving him the right motion he needs, so I'm also too distracted by this to find pleasure for myself. On top of all of this, I'm having an increasing problem with staying wet. You're probably thinking no wonder, she's got a lot on her mind and I do! Can you please help??
- Cath

Dear Cath

Yes, you do have way too much on your mind and that stuff really needs to be shutdown if you ever want to experience great orgasms. The whole process of orgasm requires surrender, so let your mind go and the quivers will follow.

If you need to be comfortably lying on your back to orgasm, you should have him get you off orally before he puts his dick anywhere near you. Just lie there and put him to work! Stop worrying so much about his pleasure; men are easy enough to please. Take care of number one first. Then a magical thing will happen. You will be really wet (typical result of being orally gratified) and you will then be able to concentrate on doing him exactly the way he likes it.

Dear Stephanie,

I'm seriously annoyed. My best friend has been seeing this chick for four months now and he never wants to do anything with me. It's always Marcia Marcia Marcia! I want my buddy back. I hate going to clubs alone. He wants to hook me up with one of her friends, but all of her friends are fat. What's an eternally single boy to do?
- Lonely Ranger

Dear Ranger,

Boy, can I relate! As the warm weather sets in, it seems all my friends are hooking up, too. Not only does this mean less hot babes to go out with, it also begins a constant barrage of attempted set ups with their new boyfriend's friends. This may at first sound convenient; however, I would like you to consider my One Cute Friend observation.

In circles of men who hang together there is always, and quite unfortunately, only one hot guy. It's what you would call a mutual benefit package. The hot guy doesn't have any competition and the dorks get all of the hot guy's leftovers. Great for the dorks ... sucks for me, the friend of the girl who dates the hot guy. The only time I haven't seen this rule in action is when I travel to Mexico, Montreal or, come to think of it, anywhere but Denver. I am assumming that his girlfriend is the one cute friend in her click? Luckily for you, gorgeous women aren't afraid to hang out with other gorgeous women, so your chances are still better than mine!

I am going to give you the same advice that I gave myself. It's quite simple: be thankful and contented about your eternal singleness. Just think about all the miserable couples out there who are no doubt at this very moment arguing over money, sex or lack of both. Visualize the suspicious women who are scouring through their boyfriends pockets, wallets and daytimers. Try to feel the heavy weight of a ball and chain and then suddenly remember ... you're free. You can do whatever you want with whomever you want. Find single people to hang with, or better yet, go out alone. It's a much better way to meet new people. And don't worry, your friend will be single again soon enough. How many people do you know that actually stay together?

Thought for the week: If you floss while having sex you get credit for neither.