HE LOVES ME,
HE LOVES ME NOT

Dear Steph,
I just read the recent Siren Chat on Internet dating. As usual, I found it very entertaining. It has raised a question in my mind, however. I am sure a lot of your readers enjoy reading about your romantic adventures and misadventures as much as I do. I'm a bit amazed that you write so candidly about such personal matters, but one of the reasons I like you so much is that you do so many surprising things.

However, I'm beginning to doubt a bit that your love life is as dull as you say. Three dates through the dating service can be considered "research," but it still is three dates and it says clearly in several papers across the country that Stephanie Glenn is "available."

This brings me to the question that I am genuinely very curious about. Like the proverbial dog that chases cars, I'd like to know what you will do when you finally catch Prince Charming? Have you thought about it? Consider me rude but I'd really like to know.
--The G Man

Dear G Man,
I guess I will be like the proverbial fisherman who fishes for sport and never keeps his catch for long. I will relish in the catch, take some photos to savor and show my friends, and then throw it back in, only to look forward to going fishing again. Or, as it was more eloquently said by George Carlin: "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll sit on a boat all day drinking beer."

Dear Stephanie,
I have read the December 21-- January 3 (Volume 2, Issue 27) edition of your Siren Chat editorial. I am writing in because I want to know what this obsession with a man's height is. You stated that if a man isn't over six feet he's gotta be a shrimp. So what's your point?

Those same guys who are shrimps now (okay, so not all of them) are going to be financially worth three times what your hunk of six feet man will be. When your man is fat and the love doesn't show up quite like you'd like, do you really think you'll even want to talk to him? If you do, will he be smart enough to hold a mildly intelligent conversation? Of course, by asking this, I am assuming that you are smart.

Then again, smart people aren't so superficial. WAKE UP!!! I think your heels are too tight or something is cutting off the blood to your brain. By passing up every guy who isn't six feet, you simply make yourself look like an idiot, and you also pass up a chance with what could be a great guy that you could truly be happy with.

I've heard the excuses about feeling like you're with a little brother, etc ... I could name about 100 of them. You're not even giving yourself a chance to get to know anyone, and by that, are cheating yourself, not anyone else.

FYI: about your little nerd remark. When they are running Microsoft, you'll be working at McDonald's. So practice the phrase: "Would you like to supersize your combo today?"
--Your Friendly (or not-so-friendly) Neighborhood Q-Hacker

Dear Q-Hack a. k. a. Midgie Man,
It seems to me you are taking one person's personal preference and a story written for entertainment purposes quite personally. But to call someone superficial for having a preference, then don't you think we would all be considered superficial? There are so many men out there who won't date women who are:

1) overweight
2) small chested
3) too smart
4) not smart enough
5) wrong color
6) bald....

And the list would go on and on. There are also plenty of women out there who will not date men who make under a specific dollar amount. I don't do that. I don't care what they do for a living as long as they aren't total mooches. And I am more concerned with personality, and even more so chemistry than the way they look. So what if I like them tall? I don't have to pretend I don't if it's a preference, and sorry shorty, it is.

When you mentioned my comments about the nerds, you must not have read clearly because I absolutely love nerds, and my friends even tease me for it. I was saying how much I love brainy guys and especially if they are wearing birth control glasses. So bring on your Microsoft boys, just make sure I don't tower over them!

One more clarification, I never said that anyone under six feet is a shrimp. What I said was the guy who put in his personal, "Height: Prefer Not To Say," must be a shrimp. Even if he was 5'8" he would have been much better off putting that than "Prefer Not To Say," because one would assume he is a shrimp! Sorry you didn't read my story as clearly as you thought you had. Maybe hitting your head on one too many doorknobs has impaired your vision.

Oh yeah, and the comment about me working at McDonald's ... even though my writing career is taking off immensely, I also have other avenues of income that have already made me financially secure for the rest of my life. Funny you would think that I even consider my security should come from a man, be he tall or like you. Even funnier that you are superficial enough to think that any woman would. But then again, you're a shrimp with a terrible personality ... women must date you for your money. Too bad you can't teach them how to super-size you.