Volume 4, Issue 9
May 2, 2002 - May 15, 2002
by Stephanie Glenn
Dear Stephanie,
I know that us guys get the bad rep for cheating, but I think it's the girls these days that
can't keep their skirts on. I was wondering if you find this to be true? I would also like to know
why you think people cheat. Also, what should I do if I find my girlfriend cheating?
--Tired of the two timers
Dear Tired,
Cheating. The dirty little habit that people deny almost as vehemently as they do masturbating.
I'm not so sure that men were ever the ones who cheated the most, they just seem to
get caught the most. Women can be much more devious about it and have an uncanny ability to
leave no trails behind. Only recently, however, have women felt comfortable owning up to their two-timing ways,
thus everyone thinks women are going through some sort of cheating revolution.
I do think that men and women cheat for different reasons. Men do it because they can. Their egos inflate quicker than their dicks when they think a woman wants to have sex with them. It's total validation. It's like a voice in their heads telling them. . . "Oh yeah, you the man!" And the funny thing about men is that they can be totally and completely in love with someone and still do it. Their primary relationship can be perfect, but that won't stop them from dipping the dumb stick where it doesn't belong. And it's only when they get caught that they suddenly have a conscience about it. And they never seem to have a good, solid reason. Their excuses range from. . . "It was a mistake, I didn't mean it." To "I swear, I didn't even see the gaping hole. I just tripped and fell in, really."
Women on the other hand, use cheating for either replacing what's missing and/or revenge. You want to know how to get a woman to cheat? Make her feel unappreciated and taken for granted. Women need to feel treasured and adored by their man and, believe me, if you aren't doing it, there are countless others out there ready, willing and waiting. And that's how it happens. She's sitting at Starbucks, tears slowly dripping in her latte, when Mr. Cuter, Richer and More Attentive than thou saunters up and offers her a tissue -- everything you stopped giving long ago. The other reason you may find your chickie cheating is if she has caught you in some philandering of your own. It doesn't matter if it was a meaningless encounter or not. She will always remember, and she will always use it to rationalize any upcoming flirtation that looks her way. That's the way women are. Sometimes we get pissed, but you can bet your ass we always get even.
Obviously you have been on the receiving side of the cheating game and for that I am sorry. Anyone who has been through that type of betrayal will have immense sympathy for you. But try to look at it like this: someone who cheats on you is actually doing you a favor. That's right, they are saving you the agony of staying in a relationship with a loser. So the second you find out about any deceit by someone, get the hell out. Don't look back. Don't listen to their ignorant pleas, just leave them and let them live with their own miserable selves. Because really, anyone who has self-esteem and a little bit of honor will not betray the one they supposedly love.
Dear Stephanie
I am the kind of guy who likes to wait a few dates before sleeping with someone, but this new
girl I am involved with is either saving herself for marriage or she is one hell of a prick tease.
We have been dating for over 2 months now and each time it seems like we are going to finally
get it on, she suddenly has to leave or sends me away. Her excuses are usually good, but I get
the feeling she might be leading me on. Will I ever get laid?
--Blue Balls
Dear Blue Balls,
I am turning this over to the hot chick panel. Since there are varying degrees of holding out, I
thought it might be helpful for you to hear from girls who are easy to the hard to get. Here is
what a couple of girls who give it up on the first date had to say. . . .
"He should just forget it. If she hasn't fucked him by now, she never will."
And. . .
"Maybe he is a lousy kisser and she figures he will fuck the same way."
Now from someone who waits a few dates, like yourself. . .
"He needs to be patient. Two months isn't really all that long. At least he knows she doesn't just jump into bed with every guy she dates."
And finally, the ice princess. A girl who rarely ever lets men get to third base. . .
"Good for her. Until a guy proves himself, why bother? Personally, I think the minute you give it to him he changes. I love to see guys going crazy with frustration."
This is what I think. . .
She could be just scared, inexperienced or saving it. Or maybe she really likes you a lot and doesn't want to rush things. There could also be an ex-boyfriend still on her mind who hurt her badly. On the other hand, she may be just teasing you. Some girls get a kick out of being make-out queens and then take care of business later, ALONE. (I think I invented this one.) And, unfortunately, there is also the possibility that she is not physically attracted to you that way. Or that you have body odor and/or bad breath. You see, Blue Balls, there are a million possibilities and the only sure way to know is to ask her.
Also visit: StephanieGlenn.com
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